Till Death do us Part?
After taking the gamble(s) and losing dearly, we are now faced with losing our home and moving into a smaller rental that we have leased. It’s been tough, but we don’t blame anybody or the economy, even though my business came to an end in late 08. We just didn’t play our cards right!
We are now faced with letting go of many a saved treasure from a 40 year old marriage, but it also brings up many a discussion on almost every item that’s facing either the charity box or be loaded on the moving truck. One has to consider the male idea of being ready to lift off at any minute or your counterpart’s idea of being well situated with all of their creature comforts, a very difficult balance to achieve.
I know we have had a great time building up a nest egg, not of cash or investments, never could get behind that idea for some reason. This is more about one of memorabilia, things that money can’t buy, that’s according to one source I know, Hmm? Every-thing’s a collectible if you can find the right collector and we both are that, but of different persuasions.
Memories are a precious thing if they are about good childhood experiences or that special pet, many of you may look back and feel like you’ve had a passel of those, or maybe a book you so dearly love? But this collecting stuff can border on hoarding. Here’s some interesting facts that link the whole activity to us and the animal kingdom as well. Let’s let my friend Wiki tell us some of the facts.
“Hoarding and caching are common behaviors in many bird species as well as in rodents. Most animal caches are of food. However, some birds will also stingily collect other items, especially if the birds are pets. Magpies are famous for hoarding items such as money and jewelry, although research suggests they are no more attracted to shiny things than other kinds of items”.
I know you may think those birds and rodents have some strange habits, but some of us humans do too, please read on.
“While there is no clear definition of compulsive hoarding in accepted diagnostic criteria (such as the current DSM), Frost and Hartl (1996) provide the following defining features:[3]“
- The acquisition of, and failure to discard, a large number of possessions that appear to be useless or of limited value
- Living spaces sufficiently cluttered so as to preclude activities for which those spaces were designed
- Significant distress or impairment in functioning caused by the hoarding
- Reluctance or inability to return borrowed items; as boundaries blur, impulsive acquisitiveness could sometimes lead to stealing or kleptomania. The hoarder may believe that the hoarded items are very valuable, or know that the accumulated items are useless but keep them anyway, or attach a strong personal value to items which other people claim would have little or no value. A hoarder of the first kind may show off a cutlery set claiming it to be made of silver and mother-of-pearl, disregarding the fact that the packaging clearly states the cutlery is made of steel and plastic.A hoarder of the second type may have a refrigerator filled with uneaten food items months past their expiration dates, but in some cases vehemently resists any attempts by relatives to dispose of the unusable food. In other cases, the hoarder will recognize the need to clean the refrigerator but due (in part) to feelings that doing so would be an exercise in futility, and overwhelmed by the similar condition of the rest of their living space, fails to do so.Hoarders of the third type often keep “collections” as a hobby. Dolls, toy soldiers, obsolete road maps, clothes, rusty tools, non-functional sewing machines.
I don’t know about you, but I sure am happy I don’t have their problem? Though , I do have peculiar issues, I must admit. While I spend these days boxing up stuff, I do have to wonder, will she ever use this stuff up and will I ever let go of this junk I’ve drug around with us for the last 40 years?
The upside is the “Tantalizing Goodies” one can find when forgotten stuff is unearthed. I could have sworn some of it has been drug from the original location we started out together to each of the 11 or 12 places we have lived. That’s somewhat sick! I’ve even found myself taking charge and making deals like, “You can keep that one, if you give up two of those.” Like I have room to dictate, with my garage full of multiples of the same tools and not 1-5 gallon bucket of thisnthat, but maybe 10 or more!
I know, I know, I am one sick puppy.